"Oh, not too much." I answer.
Today finds me off to the oral surgeon (again) for a(nother) procedure which, will complete the repair needed after that dammed tooth extraction last November.
Yep ... still working through that mess, both physically and emotionally. What amazes me is that I haven't bitten off any one's head. Not yet anyway. And ... that I am still wavering between anger, tears and feeling completely stupid.
I find myself somewhat culpable in this in that I just sort of put myself in a professionals hands so-to-speak, and completely trusted his opinion and his ability.
"Put it out of your head girl. Worse things could happen." I say to myself. I am correct about that, but then I think, "Why should I expect myself to accept bad things when they happen to me?"
Truth is, I shouldn't. I've mentioned before that I believe life, it's events or incidents, is all about perspective.
My perspective or view today is not so good.
I dreamed most of my sleep away with wild, wacky (and er, X rated) dreams and have woken with indigestion. Since I cannot eat, drink or be merry for the next number of hours, the indigestion will stay with me most of today.
Poor. Poor. Pitiful. Me.
I am bearing the cost of Dr. M's mistakes and negligence in more than emotional and physical ways. I cannot bring myself to type out what the cost of today's procedure is costing in greenbacks. I'll just say that the girls and I could have one very nice vacation if I could keep that money for our use.
Just think! Five days off from work. Today and tomorrow won't be so good, but maybe Friday through Sunday will be sunny and I'll feel well enough to venture out to ... the deck? Dr. G forewarned me that I should expect to feel better three to five days after this procedure. I'm shooting for three! Thinking positive! Wanting to be back to work first thing Monday!
A few months from now there will be one, final, corrective surgery. Good news about that! There will be no charge to me or the insurance company because Dr. G had to create this problem to work through the bigger problem. After that I should be good to go for the rest of my dental work (some that will even be covered by insurance) and I'm guessing that this time next summer I'll be eating steak off the grill and corn on the cob!
Oh ... I am so looking forward to that.